Page published on 26th February 2024
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Monday 26 February marks the start of Eating Disorders Awareness Week 2024. In this fabulous and courageous post, IP professional Sarah Miles asks us to reflect more carefully on the impact of office “cake culture” on people with often hidden eating disorders. Good allyship is about being more aware of, and supportive of, people who are different to ourselves. Sometimes it takes an article like this to remind us that we don’t all have the same responses to the things that happen around us.
Sarah writes:
Cake culture in the workplace has become a widely spread symbolic tradition of celebration, support and inclusion. From birthday celebrations to project milestones, this practice not only satisfies our collective sweet tooth, but also serves as the social glue that encourages camaraderie and collaboration in the professional setting.
While cake culture typically adds a touch of sweetness to the everyday routine of the office, it can also present challenges for individuals with eating disorders or disordered eating behaviours. Those with eating disorders often feel societal pressure to partake in cake-eating rituals. Refusing cake at a celebration can be met with raised eyebrows or awkward questions, leading to feelings of guilt or isolation.
Personally, I’ve encountered numerous anxiety-inducing comments from colleagues when opting out of food consumption during workplace gatherings. Though usually well-intentioned, such comments can profoundly unsettle anyone who has struggled with an eating disorder. Here are some common scenarios:
- “Are you on a diet?”
This enquiry may arise if someone notices that you’re being selective or mindful about what you’re eating. It can trigger self-consciousness about your dietary habits and lead to uncomfortable discussions.
- “Don’t be unsociable – it’s someone’s birthday today!”
This remark implies that abstaining from cake on special occasions is seen as unsociable or impolite, especially on special occasions like birthdays. It can make you feel pressured to eat, even if it contradicts your desires or dietary preferences.
- “You’re making me feel guilty by not having any.”
This statement suggests that your decision not to indulge is causing discomfort or guilt for the person offering the food. It can make you feel indirectly pressured into eating to alleviate the discomfort of others.
When extending an offer of food in the workplace, it’s important to approach it with sensitivity and respect for the other person’s autonomy. This means making the offer without imposing any expectations or pressure. A casual and nonchalant tone can help create a relaxed atmosphere, where the individual feels comfortable accepting or declining without fear of judgment. It’s essential to offer once and then gracefully accept their response, whether they choose to partake or not.
Employers can promote greater diversity in the food offerings during office celebrations by not only providing a range of options, but also by honouring individuals’ choices and boundaries. It’s crucial to acknowledge and accept a “no” without the need for further negotiation or debate.
Beat, a leading eating disorder charity, estimates that approximately 1.25 million people in the UK grapple with eating disorders. Surprisingly, about 25% of those impacted are male, a statistic that often catches people off guard. Consequently, it’s highly likely that you’ve encountered someone with a background of disordered eating in your professional or personal circles.
Contrary to stereotypes, not everyone with an eating disorder fits the image of being underweight, with protruding bones and a gaunt complexion. Some individuals with eating disorders may maintain a seemingly healthy weight, making it even harder to detect their struggles based on physical appearance alone. Eating disorders can be present regardless of weight, body type, ethnicity, gender or sexuality.
Overall, offering sweet treats to colleagues can be a positive and thoughtful gesture, but respectfully accepting their decision, without pressuring or causing feelings of shame, is essential for maintaining a positive and inclusive work environment. If someone declines a slice of cake or any other food, it’s best to respect their decision without questioning or coercion.
Let’s prioritise kindness over sweetness in our workplace interactions.